Farewell, oh heart of gold

Today I will no longer hear the voice and see the bright eyes of ate Lynette, my cousin, who is close to my heart. She bid farewell last night while we, her family, were by her side as she took her last breath. The tears we shed could never bring her back for she has gone and left for good. 

I will never forget her and her heart of gold. She was a good person and her kindness was genuine. She was a medical doctor by profession, an anesthesiologist. Her job was to lessen and take away the pain but during her last few months in life, she was the one in pain. It seemed as though she felt every pain she took away.  I witnessed her suffer and battle cancer until the end. She was strong but no matter how strong a person may be, the physical body will give up when it has to. It saddens me why the good people are the ones who has to go away so early. It breaks my heart even more to look at her family whom she left behind; her children so young and only had very short a time spent with their mother.

Her bubbly personality will surely be missed. She loved organizing get-togethers and reunions for the family. She loved to bake and cook; she'd call us and invite us over to snack on what she prepared. She always loved to share, that was her nature. She was a leader. We looked up to her-- being successful in life pursuing her dreams as a doctor. She inspired and encouraged us so we may reach our dreams, too. Despite her achievements she was down to earth and ready to help those who needed her support. She was generous. She loved giving gifts on special occasions and birthdays, no matter how simple or lavish. She was generous in offering her genuine kindness. She was ready to share her heart of gold to anyone even if she knew that that person has nothing to give back to her. 

She was one of a kind, a rare heart hard to find in this world. But she had to suffer, she had to bleed and cry. I looked at her and held her hand on times of "Calvary", as she called it every time her dressing was changed. My heart crushed when she sings praising songs while crying and enduring the pain. The sedatives and anesthetics couldn't take away the pain. It was God's plan that she had to suffer that way but she never blamed or hated God for that. Her strength in bearing such suffering is incredible. It was her will to survive that helped her lengthen her life despite her illness. The love and care of her family and friends aided her through that most painful last journey.

Minutes before her last breath, we knew she was ready and she had accepted that she had to go. Even though she went through so much pain, when she breathed her last there was a calm in her face and I knew right then and there, she is now in a better place.

Goodbye, ate Lynette. I will miss you.